


You Don't Know Me (Like I Want You To)

by Aston (AstonT)



Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety, Gender Dysphoria, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Non-binary gerard, Trans Character, Trans Tyler - Freeform, Tyler's family is super supportive, demiguy Brendon, unsafe binding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-03
Packaged: 2018-08-28 12:32:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8445913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AstonT/pseuds/Aston
Summary: Freshman year is daunting. Even more so when you factor in being in the wrong body on top of the already huge mess of anxiety.





	1. Chapter 1

Tyler sighed softly as he entered the high school.

He wasn't sure what it was, but he felt nervous. Perhaps that was normal for a first day, though.

Especially as a Freshman.

He shook his head in response to the thoughts drifting around in his head, taking a deep breath as he entered the building and immediately regretted it as he felt the bandage around his chest restrict. He grimaced, but didn't pause on his way through the main part of the crowd.

He glanced at his schedule warily. Music first. He could deal with that, he thought. And so, before the bell rang dismissing everyone, he made his way through the main area of the school, crowded with students talking to their friends.

* * *

 _If I never have to be in a crowd like that again, it'll be too soon,_ Tyler thought, shoving shaking hands into his hoodie pocket as he entered the music room. 

He threw a wary look around before he took a seat towards the back corner, away from the few other people in the room.

The room was only half full when class began, and Tyler found himself both glad and disappointed by that.

He only half listened to the teacher once he was handed the syllabus for the class, instead focusing his attention on the words in front of him.

He cringed, however, when he heard his name on the roll call.

"Just...just Tyler, please?" he asked, voice quiet.

The hush in the room helped him be heard, and he was grateful that the teacher looked at him and seemed to understand, because he automatically corrected himself and the name on the list.

Once they were set free for the remainder of the class, Tyler found himself being approached by someone else - long black hair covering about half of the other's face as he sat down.

"Hi." Tyler offered worriedly, chewing on the inside of his lip.

"I'm Gerard, if you didn't...catch it during roll call,"

Tyler smiled faintly in response, nodding in acceptance.

Gerard threw a look back when someone called their name.

Tyler followed his gaze, curious despite himself. He half smiled when he saw a boy with faded red hair waving at Gerard.

"Just a minute!" Gerard responded, voice louder than it had been when they were talking to Tyler. Then hazel eyes went back to the brunette. "Just....wanted to talk,"

The half-shrug that Gerard had given told Tyler all he needed to know - Gerard wasn't any more certain what they were doing than Tyler was.

"Is that...really...why you came over here?"

Gerard hesitated before they shook their head. "I came over here to invite you to sit with my friends and me," they commented. "Because why not make some friends on the first day? And also to make sure I didn't completely fuck up should I ever have to introduce you to someone - like if you joined us,"

Tyler nodded in understanding at what Gerard was saying. "Nice of you," he offered, but he could feel his anxiety rising too fast for him to be able to relax again.

**People aren't that nice, Tyler. It'll be a joke, just watch.**

Tyler nearly flinched at Blurry's voice, his words.

Gerard didn't notice, just spoke. "Alright...I know you prefer being called Tyler. Pronouns?" they asked curiously, hazel eyes light as he watched Tyler.

Tyler hesitated before he spoke. "He/him," he responded, giving a weak smile.

Gerard nodded in understanding. "Wanna come join us then? None of us bite too hard,"

"Sure..." Tyler managed after a moment.

And just like that, he found himself being drug over to a small grouping of people.

Gerard spoke while Tyler got his bearings back. "Guys, this is Tyler. Tyler, this is.."

Tyler barely caught names and put them to faces as it happened, but he nodded in understanding, pretending as if he'd remember that the next day.

"You didn't have to literally drag him over, Gee," Josh remarked with an amused smile. "He looks like he's about to pass out,"

Then mocha eyes lit in worry and his gaze fell to Tyler. "I'm using the right....?"

Tyler nodded in agreement, giving a small smile as he sat down. He found himself almost glad they were so cautious about pronouns. It was such a strange experience for him - his family tried their best, but even they had issues continuously using the correct pronouns.

Things settled down not long after that, and Tyler found himself rather enjoying the company this group offered.

There were only four of them - Gerard, Patrick, Josh, and Tyler. But the brunette was quite thankful for that. Any more people and he probably would've had a meltdown.

* * *

Of course, by lunch, Tyler was more than ready to go home. 

Gerard met him at the end of the lines with their own food and pulled Tyler outside to the small group.

"Alright, Pete, Bren, this is Tyler, he's in music with us." Gerard said with a small smile as they sat down.

Tyler followed behind and settled into eating, listening to the conversation.

"Must've been a shock to his system," Pete remarked, giving Tyler an amused smile. "Did you completely disrupt the guy's system this morning?"

"They did," Patrick responded with a laugh.

Tyler raised an eyebrow at that, looking to Gerard before he gave an amused smile at the casual use of neutral pronouns in reference.

"I forgot we never told you Gee's pronouns," Josh said with a grin. "We're usually on top of that if we have a new kid in the group."

"Any others I need to know?" Tyler asked quietly.

"Bren's changes," Pete offered. "We'll give you the heads up at the beginning of each day, if you'd like?"

Tyler nodded in agreement.

* * *

"Hey honey,"

Tyler smiled at his mom's voice as he entered, Josh following him. "Hi mom!"

Kelly moved from where she was in the kitchen, only to blink in surprise at the red-haired boy. "Hello,"

Tyler smiled faintly in response. "Mom, this is Josh." he offered, then disappeared to his room to drop his stuff off.

When he came back downstairs, it was to find Josh sitting down in the living room talking with his mom.

"I just live down the street, so I figured I'd walk Tyler home. Gee was gonna drive him, but something came up,"

Kelly smiled faintly as she looked up to find Tyler standing in the doorway. "Well, thank you for doing that."

* * *

Josh left not long after Tyler's siblings showed up. 

"I'll see you tomorrow. Either Gee or Bren will be here in the morning to give you a ride," Josh told Tyler with a knowing smile. "I tried to tell them to give you some time to get used to them, but....what can you do?"

Tyler nodded in understanding. "Thanks."

* * *

"Your friends seem nice," Kelly said to Tyler over dinner that night. 

Tyler nodded in agreement. "They are," he responded. "They're very understanding,"

Zack shared a look with his siblings before he smiled. He knew they would be judging after they met the people Tyler was considering friends. For now, they could be content knowing he was happier now than he had been. 


	2. Chapter 2

Tyler was still getting ready when Brendon showed up the following morning.

"Tyler, honey," Kelly called up the stairs. "Someone's here for you,"

A groan came from upstairs, and Tyler was seen on the stairs moments later. He stared at Brendon for a moment before understanding lit in his eyes. "Sorry. Uh...I'll be ready in a minute,"

Brendon let himself be guided inside and gave an easy grin in response. "You better be glad it wasn't Gee, Tyler!" he called out after the other boy.

Kelly watched this with a small smile. "He's....had a rough morning," she offered. "May I get a name?"

"I'm Brendon," he responded immediately.

The two were still talking when Tyler came downstairs, bag slung over his shoulder. He paused to sit down to put his shoes on.

Brendon's eyes immediately went to Tyler and he grinned with a small shake of the head. "I can't wait until Gee and me get a hold of your wardrobe," he commented. "You'll stop dressing so....plain if it kills us,"

"It just might," Tyler warned, giving Brendon a look. "Let me be comfortable in peace,"

As soon as he had his shoes on, he grabbed his bag again and got up, pulling Brendon to the door with a goodbye to his mom.

"Ready to go, are you?" Brendon asked in amusement when the two were in the car.

"Ready for today to be over with," Tyler countered, giving Brendon a deadpan look.

Brendon nodded, turning music on before pulling out of the driveway.

The ride was calm - as calm as it could be with Brendon having more energy than should be allowed early in the morning.

* * *

"He looks exhausted," Gerard said in amusement as Brendon and Tyler joined them in the art room. 

Brendon shrugged. "Wasn't even ready when I got there," he commented.

Tyler rolled his eyes in response, sitting down and laying his head against the table he was at.

He stayed like this until Josh came in. "I brought food," he said.

This got a bit of laughter.

"You spoil us," Patrick pointed out.

Josh shrugged. "I know most of you don't eat before leaving the house,"

He was quick about getting everyone their food before he sat down beside Tyler. "Sleep later, food now." he said, nudging Tyler's arm.

Tyler groaned in response, but sat up.

Josh grinned and handed Tyler a non-descript bag.

Tyler gave it a wary look. "You aren't trying to kill me, are you?"

"God, I hope not," Josh responded. "I didn't know what you liked, so I just got you the same as I usually get."

"So, taco bell," Pete pointed out.

Tyler stared at Pete in response to this before he looked at Josh. "Did you bring me Taco Bell?" he asked in surprise.

Josh shrugged, settling into his own food.

Brendon barely covered his laughter at the surprise on Tyler's face as the brunette started eating.

"I think we found his favorite restaurant." Patrick pointed out.

Josh nodded in agreement. "Well, now we know what to do if he gets mad at us,"

"Speaking of," Brendon said, looking at Gerard. "We have got to fix his wardrobe."

Gerard gave an amused laugh. "We'll see. But it isn't going to be a whole 180 change," they said calmly.

"Leave my clothes alone," Tyler warned, eyes darkening as they landed on Brendon. "I like my comfortable clothes,"

Gerard shook their head. "We won't get rid of anything," they promised. "Just add a bit to give you something different,"

Tyler went to argue before he sighed. "Fine." he grumbled, going back to his food.

* * *

Music class was a huge mess of chaos when Tyler entered the room with the others. 

His immediate reaction was to retreat, but Gerard seemed to have sense it and grabbed him around the shoulders, guiding him to sit with the rest of the group. "No one's gonna get near you,"

The chaos lasted until the teacher joined them in the room and got everything started.

"Today, we get started," he said with a wide grin to the students. "Our final project at the end of the year is going to be a performance - an original,"

Tyler's eyes widened and he immediately shrunk into himself, regretting his decision to take this class.

Gerard shot him a worried look, but continued to listen to the teacher.

"Until then, we're going to focus on different things - instruments, vocals, writing. Today, we're going to see where you stand,"

Once they were let go to talk, Gerard spoke. "Are you alright?"

Tyler nodded in agreement. "Just....scary thought, sharing an original work with an entire class of people," he managed with a shrug.

"Do you write?"

Tyler shrugged in response.

* * *

Tyler spent about half of lunch in his own world, music blaring through headphones. 

After a while, Pete reached over and pulled the headphones away from Tyler, turning the music off.

Tyler blinked at him. "Huh...?"

"We've been trying to talk to you for about five minutes now," Pete pointed out. "Gee told us about music this morning. You alright?"

"Yeah...yeah, I'm fine," Tyler said after a moment, giving a small smile. "Anxious, but alright."

This got a nod from Pete.

"Now. We were thinking, sometime this weekend, maybe we could all go to the next town up, there's this music cafe there that's supposed to be amazing," Brendon said, grinning. "You gonna come with us, Tyler?"

Tyler blinked in surprise before he shrugged. "Sure, I guess."

"Sweet,"

Josh gave Tyler a small smile in response to the strange look he was given. "Bren's just like this. We all take turns planning something to do on a weekend, once a month, usually unless it's a birthday or something. You can always bail out, I do a lot. You'll get used to it,"

Tyler nodded in understanding.

He sat back and listened to the group chat and argue without heat as he finished his lunch, quite content with the mess he'd found himself in for a change.


	3. Chapter 3

By Friday, Tyler had had his phone stolen by everyone.

He didn't complain, because they all added their numbers and made sure they had Tyler's.

Plus, the only one bold enough to go through anything on his phone was Brendon, who immediately went through Tyler's music. He ignored the nameless recordings, instead commenting on some of what Tyler had in his phone.

"I take it the nameless ones are original?" Brendon asked as he handed the phone back at lunch on Friday.

Tyler shrugged in response. "Kind of? It's just music, no words. One of them is a poem I did last year that Zack made me record."

This got a nod and the next thing Tyler knew, they were back talking about plans.

"So, we're leaving out at about noon tomorrow," Brendon said, eyes alight with excitement. "I'd suggest eating before you leave the house, and wear something comfortable, because we'll be doing a lot of walking,"

Gerard nodded in agreement. "There's this beautiful place in the mall we always go to when we go to this cafe," they offered, giving Tyler a knowing smile. "It's walking distance, so we don't waste the gas driving. I'll come get Josh and you, we'll have to explain to your mom what we're doing, I'm sure?"

"Probably best," Tyler agreed with an easy grin.

"If you have any CDs you like, bring them, if not we'll plug my phone to the aux cord and just put it on a random playlist, or listen to the radio on the way out,"

* * *

Gerard ended up giving him a ride home, with the warning to be up and ready by ten, since they had a lot to get done before noon.

Tyler nodded and threw a wave over his shoulder as he entered his home.

* * *

Tyler kept to himself until dinner, then he spoke up. "Uh...I'm going out with some friends tomorrow," he offered when everyone was quiet. 

His parents glanced at him before sharing a knowing look.

Zack grinned at him, though.

Tyler returned it before looking at his parents again. "Gee said he'd be there around ten?"

Thankfully, his parents didn't immediately shut the idea down, and Tyler found himself going to bed with his mind buzzing in excitement.

* * *

The following morning, he was up getting ready at nine, and was only half dressed when Gerard showed up. 

"You'd better at least have a binder on, Tyler," Gerard said warningly as they pushed the door open.

Tyler laughed, back turned to the door as he dug for a shirt in his closet.

"You're hopeless," Gerard remarked, moving to push Tyler gently out of the way to start digging through the boy's wardrobe.

They frowned, but wound up throwing Tyler a tank top before sighing. "I have an extra shirt in my car," they remarked. "If nothing else, I'll have Josh run home and get a shirt for you that isn't black and faded out."

Tyler nodded, pulling the tank top on before grabbing his shoes and letting Gerard pull him from the room.

"I see Gee found you, then," Josh said in amusement from where he was explaining to Tyler's parents what the plan was.

Gerard laughed. "We've got to get him a real binder," they told Josh. "ACE isn't acceptable,"

Josh winced in agreement. "We'll pick one up at the mall,"

Tyler went bright red, going to argue, but Gerard shook their head. "No, no, Tyler. If we're gonna fix your wardrobe, you have to let us buy you stuff. First step is a real binder so you don't break yourself. You pass well enough as it is, why do damage?"

Kelly smiled at the exchange before she spoke. "Go eat, sweetie."

Tyler smiled and disappeared to the kitchen, glad to have an excuse to get away from the living room.

Gerard shook their head, sitting down quietly when asked to.

"So what's the plan today?" Kelly asked curiously.

Gerard gave a small smile and settled into explaining. "This will come up every few weekends, we'll do our best to get you a heads up, Mrs. Joseph."

"Just Kelly is fine," Kelly corrected with a laugh.

Gerard nodded, then continued. "This time it was Bren's turn to choose something, it's a group thing that keeps us...well...sane, I guess. It lets us get out and spend time together without the stress of school. We're just going to the next town to a cafe and then to the mall, we should be home before it gets too late," they offered. "We'll get in touch if it's going to be late, though."

Tyler joined them right about then with a bowl of cereal and smiled in response to the knowing look his mom gave him.

"Do I even have to say it?"

Tyler shook his head. "I know. Don't climb anything,"

Gerard raised an eyebrow in response to this before they shot a knowing grin to Tyler. "We'll definitely keep an eye on him," they promised.

* * *

As soon as they were in Gerard's car and heading out, though, Gerard spoke. "You're definitely gonna be climbing shit, aren't you?"

Tyler gave a wry smile. "Maybe," he admitted.

"Well...be careful if you do, and give one of us a warning."

The ride out was filled to the brim with random talking and singing.

By the time they'd parked beside Brendon's car, they were all breathless from laughter.

"Have a nice ride over, then?" Patrick asked with a smile.

Tyler looked up at him with a wide grin as he got out of Gerard's car.

Gerard was the one who spoke next, directing their words to Brendon. "Don't let me forget we gotta get Ty an actual binder so he can stop the ACE bullshit, will you?"

"Whoah, how do you even know he uses ACE wrap?" Brendon asked with a teasing grin.

Gerard only shrugged. "He wasn't ready when Josh and me got there, I gave him a warning before I entered his room." they commented, then looked to Tyler, who was arguing quietly with Josh about the skeleton hoodie he'd been handed to put over the tank top Gerard had thrown at him.

"What, couldn't find anything decent for him to wear?" Brendon questioned in amusement as the group headed into the cafe.

Gerard groaned. "It's all faded and stretched out and...I just had Josh run in his house and grab something for Ty,"

* * *

Once they had all sat down with coffee, Brendon spoke, his voice excited. 

"Alright, since it's Tyler's first weekend out with us," he started, dark brown eyes sparkling happily. "A toast,"

Tyler blinked in surprise before he gave a wry smile.

"He always does this," Josh told him under his breath while Brendon was talking. "Every time we have someone new join us for one of these things. He tends to scare them away."

Tyler bit the inside of his lip to keep from laughing.

* * *

Despite his protests, Gerard and Brendon remembered the binder and threw the bag at him and shoved him towards one of the restrooms in the mall with an order to go put it on. 

When Tyler joined them with the ACE bandage in his hand, Gerard grinned. "You're welcome, Tyler."

Tyler gave them an unamused look before he smiled. "Thanks,"

"Feel better?" Josh asked with a smile.

"So much," Tyler admitted. "I can actually breathe,"

* * *

Tyler wound up calling his mom at about seven to give her the warning that he'd be in late. 

She only responded with a be careful before hanging up.

At sunset, Tyler found a nice place to sit to watch the colors of the sky change into the darkness of night.

Of course, he did manage having to climb to reach it.

He nudged Josh and nodded towards where he was going before doing so, but it scared the hell out of everyone else.

"Ty, what are you doing?" Brendon asked warily.

Tyler glanced back at them for a moment before he grinned. "Going up to the ledge to watch the sunset," he offered.

Josh wound up joining Tyler, but the others decided it best to stay on the ground where they were.

Once the sky had faded from the array of orange and pink to a deep blue-black filled with red and blue and silver specks of stars, Josh pulled Tyler back down to the rest of the group.

He wound up staring out at the sky the entire way home.


	4. Chapter 4

The next day, Tyler received messages from everyone else in the group, checking in on how he was feeling. But besides that, he was left alone.

And so, he spent the day at the keyboard, playing random bits of a melody he liked.

* * *

After dinner, Tyler's phone went off again and he glanced at it to see Josh's name. 

_6:57 pm - Gee's kidnapping us in 10. Important, cnt miss. Tell ur mom._

Tyler groaned, but moved to his door. "Mom!" he called out. 

Kelly's voice sounded up the stairs, worried. "Yes sweetie?"

"Gee's on their way! Something came up that they need help with!"

No response came, so Tyler moved to throw on his vans and get his binder on.

He was ready to go by the time that Gerard and Josh got there.

"What's going on?" Kelly asked curiously as Tyler grabbed his jacket from the closet by the door.

Gerard shook their head. "I wish I knew. I got a message from my brother, and I'd rather have help,"

Kelly nodded in understanding.

Tyler gave her a smile and grabbed his house key before letting himself be led outside.

* * *

Josh seemed calm, Tyler noted. Even amused, when he saw the brunette gripping the handle on the door so hard that his knuckles were white. 

"Sorry, you'll get used to Gee's driving,"

Tyler hummed in agreement.

When they'd finally stopped, Tyler relaxed again, and barely had time to get out of the car before Gerard had darted into the house alone.

Josh shrugged to the questioning look Tyler sent him, leading the other boy into the house. "They're always like this about Mikey,"

A mess of shattered glass greeted the two boys in the entry way.

Gerard was nowhere to be seen for a moment.

In the next moment, however, they came back into view. "Get him out,"

Josh nodded in agreement, moving to grab the boy that Gerard pushed towards them. "C'mon, Mikey." he said quietly.

Tyler moved to open the car door for them.

Mikey looked terrified, Tyler noted as Josh helped him to take a seat.

"What happened?" Josh asked, voice quiet.

"Same thing as always,"

Tyler was surprised that the boy's voice didn't shake, but immediately abandoned thoughts like that in favor of moving to help Gerard carry bags to the car.

Mikey's eyes widened as he watched Gerard.

"I told you, if I had to come get you out, you were staying with me," Gerard said with a fond smile to him.

* * *

They wound up back at the Joseph residence, since it was the closest place that had medical supplies. 

Kelly blinked in surprise at the state of the new addition, but immediately disappeared, only to come back with a first aid kit.

"What happened?" she asked quietly as Gerard got to work patching Mikey back up.

Josh sighed, shaking his head. "Their parents are kinda shit," he commented, eyes staying on the Way siblings. "Apparently, they went off on Mikey for him still talking to Gee."

Kelly nodded in understanding. "They're gonna be okay?"

Tyler stayed back, listening, but not actively participating.

Josh nodded in agreement. "Mikey might be a bit shook up for a bit, but he'll be fine. Gee will send a message to everyone else and tell them, everything will be back to normal soon."

Kelly fell silent then, disappearing and coming back with a mug of hot chocolate.

Mikey gave her a small smile - something that Gerard remarked didn't happen often - when she handed it to him. "Thank you,"

Once Gerard was done, they let Tyler put the first aid kit away before they sent a message to the rest of the group.

They glanced at Tyler when he got back into the room. "Go get your binder off. I know I interrupted your evening,"

Tyler shrugged, hesitating. "Everything good?'

Gerard gave a wry smile. "Everything will be just fine," they promised. "I'm gonna take Mikey home with me and get him settled. Bren will come get you in the morning,"

And just like that, Gerard bid them a goodbye with a thank you to Kelly, guiding his brother to the car.

Josh smiled after the two before shaking his head. "I best get home and tell my parents what happened, they're worried sick," he said, darting off with a goodnight.

"Strange people you made friends with," Kelly pointed out with a fond smile to her son.

Tyler nodded in agreement, disappearing to his room for the night.


End file.
